Cheap Flight from Northern Cyprus

Wanted – Cheap Flight from Northern Cyprus – Quick.  And the reason why?  My rescue puppy Milfred Wensleydale Williamson…

…whilst out for an innocent constitutional she pooped copiously outside the occupied sentry box of the smartest barracks in town…

Not only did I nearly die of embarrassment but I was nearly hung, drawn and quartered there and then by the soldier on duty whose dubious duties naturally include keeping the entrance and façade of the building cleanus intactus!

So, yes, I need a cheap flight outta here and I need one now.  In actual fact I hobbled my way back to the office dragging Milfred behind (whilst still pooing) (her, not me)…hobbled as I have done me ‘ip in…and clambered up the stairs, grabbed the nearest roll of kitchen paper and a bin bag, scampered back and got down on my hands and knees in the main road outside the barracks and picked up, scrubbed up and cleaned up the mess.

The soldier was actually very nice about it and while he didn’t put down his gun and offer to assist, he did come out of the box and watch with wry amusement tattooed all over his face.  Thank God no General or general VIP type person turned up.  Mind you I did get a few honks and beeps from motorists in passing cars bemused or amused by my behaviour…

It must be a thing dogs do – embarrass their owners I mean - by pooping at inopportune moments in inappropriate places!  Cheese did the self same thing not far from where Milly deposited her load this morning when he was a wee one – and stupidly I didn’t have the utensils required for the removal of the delivery then either and I also had to take him back to the office before returning to the scene of the crime.

Naturally enough I guess it does look odd to see a woman on her hands and knees picking up poop in the middle of the street when there is not a dog to be seen for miles around…